Rock Star

Free time is plentiful and I'm bloggin again. Well, at least I changed my Fall background. This background is from the set called "Rock Star." I felt a little like a needed a rock star image, so I went with it. AND it was PINK! Who could resist? Plan to blog something more important soon, but we'll see :)

Comments Anyone?

Okay, so I know I have a fair amount of blog readers out there who actually read and enjoy my blog simply because you make verbal comments to me after you've read one that speaks to you. However, since many of you don't blog yourselves and recieve my blogs by email, you may not realize that you can actually go on my blog and make a comment. The blog is so much more fun to look at than just a simple black and white email :)

Follow these instructions to visit the blog and make a comment:
1. go to http://alichall.blogspot.com
2. click on the word comments located at the bottom of the blog you would like to comment on
3. type in your comment in the box
4. if you have a google or yahoo email account, you can simply enter it in the appropriate box OR simply choose the Open ID box to leave a comment
5. Hit "Publish your Comment" and VOILA! you send smiles to me :)

One of the main reasons I post is so that I may encourage others to ponder their relationship with Christ, family, and friends. It is my desire to challenge others to wholeheartedly pursue their relationship with HIM, so that every relationship they have here on earth is strengthened.

If I do that in any way, let me know. If I don't hear from you, I'll take that as a sign that God wants me to use my time more effectively.

A special thanks to all my "buddies" who consistently encourage me in my writing. One day you'll all be immortalized as a character in a book or a topic of an article;)

Can't wait to hear from you!

My Obsession

What do pom poms, baby dolls, and Ricky Schroeder have in common?  Not much, except for the fact that I had a passion for them when I was a young girl.  During its television run, I never missed an episode of Silver Spoons, starring my favorite blonde-headed obsession, Ricky.  My pom poms were always shaking for  I spent every waking moment ( and probably a few sleeping moments) practicing cheer  moves and cartwheels.  When I wasn't cheering or watching TV, I was playing house, school, and  grocery store with my baby dolls.  Those passions encouraged me to dream of one day becoming Ricky Schroder's wife and mother of his children while maintaining a career as a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader.

I know some of you may be chuckling to yourself, "What silly dreams?"  But before you laugh, think about all the times you wrote your name and attached it to Elvis Presley's or maybe even one of those mop-haired Beatle boys.  What about Tom Cruise's? Or could it be that you were obsessed with Barbie's wonderfully pink world of sports coupes, beach houses, and RVs which were occupied by the entire Barbie ensemble?  Some of you may have covered your rooms in collections of stuffed animals, Cabbage Patch dolls, tie-dyed clothes, or even Beanie Babies.  Whatever it was, I am sure that you can identify with being obsessed with something during your younger years.

If the childhood obsessions do not come back so quickly, maybe reminiscing about more recent times can help.  As a woman in today's world, we have a tendency to become obsessed with all the different roles society tells us to play.  Our career can lead us to being overly passionate about climbing the corporate ladder or pursuing a better education.  Our desires for the perfect family can initiate an obsession for angelic, popular, and successful children, or for the strongest and most romantic marriage.  In addition, our passion to obtain a higher social position can lead us to be obsessed with our body image and having the right wardrobe.  While a little passion about each of these can be helpful and productive, too much can be frustrating, controlling, and ultimately destructive.

Most people would agree that having an obsession or uncontrollable passion is  a negative thing, but what if you were given a magnificent obsession that consumed every thought, word, and deed and also gave your life a glorious purpose instead of destroying it. Can such a thing exist, you ask?  This singular positive obsession is an uncontrollable passion for Christ.  When it is pursued with devoted prayer and Bible study, the results can only be positive.  In contrast, take a look back a what those childhood collections of stuffed animals and Cabbage Patch kids gained you - nothing.  Matthew 6:19 encourages our obsession with God: "Do not store up for yourselves treasures here on earth where moth and rust destroy and thieves break in and steal.  Store up treasure in heaven where moths and rust cannot destroy and thieves cannot break in and steal."  By "collecting" bible study time, prayerful moments, and fellowship with other believers, you store up a treasure in heaven that is priceless and can never be taken away or lost.  Similarly, those innocent fantasies we had for various movie and rock stars never became a reality -- Ricky Schroder never showed up at my door with flowers, and he surely never asked me to become his wife and mother his children.  Yet my God promises, "If you seek Him, He will be found by you" (1 Chronicles 28:9).  My obsession with seeking God promises that I will find Him.  In addition, remember those walls we decorated with Teen Beat posters, album covers, pictures of beauty queens, collections of dolls and stuffed animals; eventually, each one was taken down and put away.  However, our passion for Christ compels us to redecorate the rooms of our hearts with His word.  This new interior design is invincible: "The grass withers and the flower falls but the word of the Lord stands forever" (Isaiah 40:8). This God obsession continues to be positive as we plaster His word all over our lives: "Hide His word in our heart, so that we might not sin against Him" (Psalms 119:11, NIV, italics mine).  Finally, even those adult passions can lead to our downfall: "For what does it profit a woman to gain the whole world -- with a perfect family, super-model body, successful career, and inspiring marriage -- yet lose her own soul" (Luke 9:25, NIV, italics mine).

No matter what we choose to be obsessed with here on earth, it will lead to our destruction unless we choose to be obsessed with God. This magnificent obsession never destroys, never disappoints, never fails, never falls short of our dreams, and never goes unfulfilled.  The Old and New Testament encourages us several times to love God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength.  That is the definition of obsession - loving something so much that it consumes your whole being -- mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  May it become our prayer to find and obsession with Christ that produces a gloriously fulfilling life just like the words to this chorus so aptly state: 

Give me one pure and holy passion

Give me one magnificent obsession.

Give me one glorious ambition for my life

To know and follow hard after You.

After all these years, my pom poms have been shelved, baby dolls passed down to my sweet little girl, and Ricky has married someone else, but my obsession with the Lord still burns white hot.

Older and Wiser

I'm baaaaack!  Sorry for the two week haitus but like my earlier blog said,  life gets in the way quite often.  

Anyway, just a note to say - I'm old.  Today while entering the gym, a young man politely held the door open for me.  (Manners still exist in the younger generation.) Anyway, I responded with a kind thank you to which he quickly replied, "You're welcome, Maam."  OUCH!  Just when I was feeling good about my recent working out and slimming up some more. However, I must say that the 30's have been great even though I spent about two years dreading them. Well, here I am and there's no turning back.  I'm happy with me and my age.  But just a note that in the future, young man, you better keep respecting your elders :)

Beam Me Up!

Sometimes during the praise and worship part of our church services, I have a mental image much  like that of Captain Kirk's being "beamed up" by the Enterprise's transporter.  I'm totally unaware of the people around me and get lost in God in the middle of a very familiar place.  At that moment, there is no where else I could dream of being.  Those worship times remind of a song we often sing entitled "Better is One Day" which simply says, "Better is one day in your courts than thousands elsewhere." We all have our good and bad days, but even those days that I think couldn't get any better can never compare with just one day in the presence of God.  

Many of you may be wondering: "Have I ever really experienced a day like this?"  If you have to stop and think very long about it, you probably haven't.  Furthermore, if you haven't experienced a moment in His presence, you are really missing something incredible.  

Consider this word picture:  One of my favorite places in the world to be is on the beach in the late afternoon sun: the waves rhythmically crash into the shore, seagulls frolic in the azure world above me, the sun's warmth envelopes me, and the love of my life sits on the towel beside me. At that moment, life could not be more perfect! However, the truth is that a moment of true worship and communion with God could not match a thousand of those days.  What an awesome experience! 

I never pass up an opportunity to head to the beach and be renewed by its peacefulness and enjoy some relaxation away from my hectic world.  If my time with God in true worship is a thousand times better than one of those days at the beach, why would I not take every opportunity to be in God's presence?  Why do I rob myself of the chance to be renewed, relaxed, and at perfect peace?  Yet there are Sunday mornings when I just don't feel like worshipping, or I spend praise and worship time questioning, "Why me God?" or "When are you going to answer my prayer, God?"  All the while, I should be renewing my love and commitment to Him no matter what I am going through or how long He may take to answer a prayer.  

A true worshipper will come in a service ready and excited about having the opportunity to commune with God, be renewed physically, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.  We can have all of that just by entering into His courts during praise and worship, ignoring the people and things around us, and focusing our thoughts and energy on God as we sing songs of dedication, prayer, praise, and thanksgiving.  Yet each Sunday (and other days during the week), we simply sit back and read the words off the screen like we're reciting the phone book.  Is it any wonder why we don't move FORWARD to intimacy in our relationship with God?  Why our prayers never seem to be answered?  And why we can't know victory in our everyday Christian life?  The answer and victory will come when we learn to take those 45 minutes and every other spare moment to worship God no matter what is happening around us.

Take time to picture your most perfect day then multiply that feeling by 1000.  That's what you are missing every Sunday morning when you CHOOSE to waste those minutes of praise and worship. (Let's be clear - it is a choice!)  Make a determined effort not to let Satan rob you of those moments when God can transport you into His courts where peace, contentment, and quiet solitude reign and be renewed as you learn to worship at any cost.  Then you will know as others do that Captain Kirk's transporter can't compare to being "beamed up" into God's presence. 

Grandparents Day

In honor of grandparents day (September 7), I decided to post a poem I wrote shortly after my grandfather's death.  He was such an important and special part of my life. When he passed away, I truly felt like my childhood had ended.  Hopefully this poem will give you some insight into  just how WONDERFUL he was.

In All Seasons

In Autumn,

He was in-house forts

built with chairs, worn bed sheets

and the whirl of an electric fan.

He was the knee-horse

bucking you through

that old "field tum a wield."

In Winter,

He was the recipe

of drowsy mornings, mixed heartily

with cartoons and cereal

baked in the glow of a well-stoked fire.

He was 3 AM Christmas mornings

of a letter to Santa that came true

by that austere Christmas fir.

In Spring,

He was the song

"Doodle-bug, won't you come out tonight"

accompanied by the sounds of tractor tinkering.

He was a day of long walks

down that yellow dirt road

that always lead to my 

favorite candy bar and Coke.

In Summer,

He was tractor rides

catered with iced watermelon

and straight-from-the-field sugar cane.

He was a push on the tattered rope tree swing

that sent you to the heavens and back.

In all seasons,

He was a child's day of play

that even the sunset could not end.

But mostly, he was my grandaddy,

this child's best friend.

New Family Member

Famous Last Words: "We can  go look at the puppy, but we're not gonna buy one yet."  

LOL!  Tuesday after work Keifer comes home and says he found a beagle puppy and it's only in Georgia a little over a hour away.  Want to go see them.  Understand here that we just gave our golden retriever away last Saturday to a loving home simply because her big doggie frame was too much for our new home and tiny back yard.  I had to coax the kids for several months about giving her away.  Finally, they agreed and we found a wonderful couple who specifically wanted a golden and planned to treat her as "their baby."  Copper left on Saturday morning, and Tagger joined our family Tuesday night.  We love dogs and did a lot of research on beagles and found that they would fit best with our family and our lifestyle.  We wanted a small dog that sheds minimally, great with kids, and had plenty of personality.  Tag, as we've nicknamed him, has plenty of it all.    Anyway, the kids love him and he's seems to like us pretty well too.

I don't know why I thought I could "window shop"  for a puppy; I can't even window shop at the mall :)

Just over 8 years and 16 hours ago, my sweet little Bayleyboo entered this world.  To say I was giddy on the day I found out I was having a little girl would be an understatement and now I was holding her in my arms.  She had a closet full of pink that I couldn't wait to get on her.  Below is a poem, I wrote upon bringing her home.

Bedtime Swooning

In the dark of night

with the moon's quiet light

Sliding through slits in the shade,

There she lay

Serenity personified

Innocence unknowing

Sweetness glowing

All in the face of 

one small child.

Eight years have passed and that little baby has grown into an amazing little girl.  Here's a glimpse into who she is. 

Bayley loves...

pickles.  (Thus the picture to the right. She goes through a jar in about 3 days.)  

shoes.  (This is cute right now, but give it a couple of years, and I'm convinced this might be a problem.)

mirrors.  (It's not for vain reasons but for entertainment.  Who needs a playmate when you can stand in front of a mirror and have a complete conversation with your reflection?   Who needs an audience for a performance when you can just dance and sing for yourself and an imaginary audience?)

friends.  (She loves to be with friends and the more the merrier.)

Kidtropolis. (Whatever you do, don't remind her that she miss Kidtropolis service when we're out of town.  She'll just want to know if we can come home early.)

her daddy.  (In fact, every night she wants to sleep in one of his t-shirts.  He will be wrapped around her finger until the  day he dies.)

school. (She definitely has her momma's genes. She's gonna be a nerd- just like her momma- but at least she'll be wearing cute shoes while she makes the honor roll.)

baby dolls and stuffed animals. (The day is fast approaching when she won't even want to play with them anymore. Tear rolling down the cheek here.)

questions. (I thought the questions were supposed to slow down after the age of three.  Not with Bay, her questions only get more complicated and her conversations more philosophical. )

debate. (These last two go hand in hand.  Her Daddy is convinced she would make a great attorney.  She's got questions AND answers for most any situation.  Visit us at bedtime and you'll see.)

Jesus. (I saved the best for last.  Her heart towards God is so tender.  So many times, I've been able to redirect her behavior simply by reminding her of how Jesus would want her to act. She's also reminded me a couple of times as well :)

Happy Birthday Bay!  You are my heart:)

Little Boy No More

So my son hopped in the car this afternoon and preceeded to have the following convo with me.

"Mom, everyone is worried about the 5th grade dance."

 "Why, isn't that dance at the end of the school year?" I responded nonchalantly.

"Because it's hard to get a date."  he replied.

Suppressing so many emotions here: laughter, sadness, nostalgia, fear, etc.  I responded back, "Oh, I didn't realize it was that tough."

With a sigh, he added, "Well, if I have to ask someone in my class, I'm gonna ask _____." (gotta leave out the name to protect the little  fellow)

In Mommy wisdom, "I'm pretty sure you could ask anyone in fifth grade if you wanted to."

"Oh." Pauses for a moment to think of someone else he'd like to invite.  "Well, I don't even know how to dance."

"That's okay buddy. I can teach you some moves."  I say with a smile.

He smiles back, not quite sure if he's gonna take me up on that.

So here I sit, pondering that conversation.  So much said with so little words.  I've always heard that kids will grow up before you know it.  So  true.  I believe we've just entered a new phase, and it's one I'm not ready to travel.  Even when I reached over to hold his hand for a minute today, he didn't respond quite like he used to: eager and affectionate.  I know he still loves me, but I'll have to enjoy those affectionate moments on his terms. I'm okay with that, but now I wished I held his hand a little more when he wanted to,  sat a little longer holding him in my lap to read a story, laid a little longer on his bed for kiddie conversation, and looked in him in the eye a little harder while he was telling me a story.  

He's an amazing little fellow and I pray that God takes him on adventures beyond his imagination.  But today, I pause for a just a moment, let a quiet tear roll down my cheek, and remember when he was my sweet little Cademan.

Successful First Day

So the kiddies and I headed out the door this morning for day #1 of 180 this year.  Both were so excited that they actually talked to one another (in a civil manner) all the way to school.  The energy in the car was palpable  and I was glad.  Who wants to take screaming kids to school? Not me.  Anyway, both hopped out of the car and went merrily on their way to class.  I, on the other hand, did not skip so merrily to my office.  

It's not that I dreaded work today but it seemed different.  I have to say I was the opposite of stressed out -- sorry Rho.  I was almost chilled out and apathetic.  Up until a few weeks ago, I was dreading school and my job, but now it's almost a go with the flow attitude.  (Hopefully, no one student will interrupt that flow.)  You know that peace that passes understanding - it was my friend today.  Although I know that I'm in some sort of transition period and not sure where I'm going or what I'm feeling, I'm completely at ease and focused on where I am currently.   

Isaiah 26:3 says that God "will keep in perfect peace all who trust in HIM, all whose thoughts are fixed on HIM!" The  past three weeks have sent me straight to  His side and my thoughts have been COMPLETELY focused on Him because of my situation.  He truly has taken a heart in turmoil and replaced it with  the peace that passes this girl's understanding.

If your mind is in turbo fueled by worry, find a verse that reaffirms all that God is and FOCUS on that each time your mind wants to go back to that turbulent thinking.  He will give you his peace and you won't even be able to explain why your so calm about the chaos that revolves around you.  He will be your strength and your sanity :)

New School Year

I love a new school year! I'm not much for New Year's resolutions and January 1st being " The New Year." Mine starts every August when school gears back up. I know autumn hangs just around the corner and soon the marching band will belt out the school's fight song, and I'll find some calm in the routines of life. However, the thing that thrills me most about the start of a new school year is the chance to purchase school supplies: there's nothing quite like a brand new box of Crayola crayons, unblemished and promising. One of my favorite things to buy every year--and it's more age appropriate than the Crayolas--is a new notebook. I stroll the aisles of Target and Wal-Mart oohhing and aahhing over all the pretty patterns and funky color choices.

When holding a fresh-from-the-shelf notebook in my hand, I'm almost giddy. The color-coordinated patterns appeal to my sense of fashion, and it's almost like I've bought a fabulous new ensemble, but I only had to pay three bucks for it. I can't wait to fill it with notebook paper and snazzy dividers. I feel pretty; I feel organized; I feel hopeful! For me, polka-dotted polyurethane wrapped around metal rings signal an exchange of last year's mistakes and frustrations for a new attitude and hopeful heart. In essence, a fresh notebook means new beginnings, unlimited possibilites, and a chance to learn.

I love to learn! I am a student by nature; in fact, I'm one of those people who longs to go back to college just so I can sit around and have deeply intelligent discussions about literature, life, and God. Truthfully, I'm a nerd. My students often get tickled at me because I'll get so excited about what I'm about to teach them. My passion for learning empowers me to spread that passion to others. Most 8th graders, however, don't normally share my enthusiasm, but at least they won't find my class boring. In the middle school world that says a lot. Getting a pristine new notebook signifies that learning is about to take place, so with pencil in hand, eyes toward the teacher, ears tuned, I eagerly begin my education.

Unlimited possibilities are packaged right along with that notebook as well. Every school year I make new goals. I decide to pursue my writing career, keep up with my housework, spend more time with friends, increase patience with my children, and love my husband better. I know that I won't succeed at all of them, but at least I get a chance to do better than I did last year. That,in itself, brings so much peace.

I love a new spiritual notebook more than a Target one. Lamentations 3 tells me "Great is His faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each day!". 2 Corinthians also tells me that once I have Christ in my life, I am "not the same anymore, for the old life is gone. A new life has begun!" In reality, God gives me a new notebook everyday! I get a chance to start again, make changes, reach new heights, and experience things "immeasurably beyond anything I could ask or imagine" (Ephesians 3:20). I long to fill my spiritual notebook with the goals of walking closer with God than I did last year, being a better mother and wife, encouraging and instructing others in the paths of righteousness, and living a life more pleasing to God. I also determine to change those personality weaknesses with the help of Christ, which means that any discouragement or negative criticism from last year is left to wither in the dog days of Summer. Autumn brings the chance to replace last year's frustrations and hurts with God's word. What a gift!

Next week, I take the kids school shopping, and I'll purchase my new notebook. I'm truly grateful, Lord, that it's that time of year again. May I fill the pages with wise choices, triumphs over tragedy, memories with friends, and sweet, quiet moments shared with You. "Teach me your way, O LORD, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name." Psalm 86:11

Inspiration Fails Me

So I had high hopes of coming back to post a day or so ago. You can see that it didn't happen, and I completely forgot exactly what it was that I wanted to share with you. The funny part left me as well.

All seems quiet in the house (and as from my earlier post, we all know that this can change in the blink of an eye), dinner is in the oven, hubby is reading a book (yes, I did say reading), so I might be able to actually post.

Currently, I'm reading the book Through Gates of Splendor by Elisabeth Elliot. If you've never heard of it, I'll give a little background. It's the story of 5 missionaries to the jungles of Ecuador who set out to establish communication with an isolated tribe called the Waoranis. All five ended up losing their lives for Christ, but the story is absolutely amazing. Each widowed a wife, and several left behind very young children. I read with a highlighter handy because Elliot writes so poignantly and because much of the book is filled with the journal writings of these five amazing men. It is altogether a biography that nspires and steps on toes.

One quote from Ed McCully's journal goes perfectly with my current situation: struggling to do what I feel I have to do and the struggle to do what I MUST, live the high calling God has given me. Ed McCully spoke of this struggle while in the jungles of Ecuador, AND he was a missionary, for goodness sake. I mean he was doing what he MUST and that was living a life totally devoted to Christ even unto leaving all behind for a forsaken jungle. In his jounral, he writes "It's hard to keep our primary purpose in view when we get so swamped with secondary things." TELL ME ABOUT IT ED!

This is my struggle right now. I feel as if I have go back to school, earn a paycheck, etc, etc, yet I realize that once this starts, what I MUST do and what I want to do will take a back burner (see earlier posting.)

I've asked God to help me order my time, give me an easy school year, and a discernment to avoid all "business" that doesn't allow me to do what He's called me to do. I have to say He has helped me learn to say "No, I can't commit to that right now." Even though sometimes, I really would like to. My constant determining question (which my husband is now adopting) has been "In the grand scheme of life, what does this really matter?" Ask yourself this question about any situation or choice and, boy, it really helps narrow things down a bit.

Anyhoo (as Rupert would say), I've lingered on this thought for a while and will probably continue, but Pink Lady, at least I posted :)

Life Gets in the Way

Was going to blog just a second ago but now life has gotten in the way and I can't :( Check back later for my lingerings on blogging in general. I feel inspired and funny but lets see how long it sticks around.

School starts back in less than two weeks. YIKES! I can honestly say this year I'm really struggling with the desire to go back. I'm actually dreading it. Overwhelmed is probably the perfect word. This year I will have my very first intern ( one I'm not so sure about mind you-- not one of those interns you can let loose in your classroom and know everything will be alright), I'll be teaching six classes instead of 5 (translate 25 more papers to grade and 1 hour less to do it each day), AND I'll be co-teaching three days a week. Now to some this sounds like "Hey, some extra help!" In some ways that's true; however, it would be like sharing the kitchen when you've been the only chef for the past seven years. All in all, I'm struggling with the relinquishment of power. I like running my classroom and so far been pretty successful. Now, I've got to change and I'll be honest: I DON'T WANT TO! It's too much work and I just want it to be easy. (I don't know why I expect things to be easy as they RARELY are in my life.)

Side note: I'm also a little concerned that God is taking me in a new direction -- out of the classroom maybe. I don't really know and as much as I love a new adventure, it is always a little scary to brave out into the unknown. My unsettled heart is a definite indication that He's changing something. I know I'll do what He's gonna ask me to do, I just hate the waiting and the figuring it out. Anybody else like that?

One final note that mostly will make sense to the Ecuador crew. The book is in the beginning stages. I can honestly say that I've taken steps to fulfill one destiny that God has for me. I'm excited and God is building my confidence everyday. I don't feel like I'm just "playing with the wax" anymore :)

Big Sister Pride

So all my sister bloggers complain that I don't post enough. Well here I am and I'm posting. Today there's so much floating in my brain that I don't know where to start. Since my last few - well my only two- posts have been sort of a rant, I'm going with a positive rave today.

Last night's youth service was wonderful. And I'm not just saying that because my husband is the youth pastor -- although he Is the best one around. It was wonderful because God was there in a real way. During worship, we sang a song entitled "You Are Good." It was powerful. From the first word, I began to cry. It was a realization of how good God really is in my life and what I had to be proud of and thankful for, and last night I was both, due to the voice that sang that song.

I won't mention her name but she knows who she is. When she began to sing, the annointing of God flowed through her. As I stood and listened, I realized that God uses her because she knows Him. I mean really knows Him. She spends time with Him; she revels in her relationship with Him. I vouch for this because I KNOW her heart. Last night, I was so proud of her not for her vocal performance (although it was magnificent) but because she truly lives a life that pleases God. It is written in all her words and actions. Her very desire is that others know God in the way she does, serves Him with all they have, and desperately wants ALL to have the relationship with HIM. No she isn't perfect -- she knows that and so do I, but she is striving to be ALL that God has called her to be.

I've watched her grow in some amazing ways the past eight years. I can' wait to see what God does with her life. She has no idea the ADVENTURE He has planned for her and the amazing path He's carved out just for her.

I'm so proud because God has allowed me to be a spiritual big sister and knowing that I've influenced such an amazing young lady is simply a sweet gift from Him that I treasure daily. Be encouraged today my little sis - you keep going after God and no matter who disagrees with you about your "crazy" list, HE WILL REWARD YOU! "For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favor and honor; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless." Psalm 84:11

Don Quixote and Me

So I've got a new word. Not only does it sound great when it rolls of the tongue but it fits me oftentimes perfectly. Quixotic. (quicks ah tic) Let's use it in a sentence: Alicia's quixotic thoughts often lead to frustration and disappointment. Can you figure it out? Well, in order to give you a good understanding of why it applies to me, I shall define it. Quixotic: exceedingly idealistic; unrealistic and impractical. For example, carrying a sweet little baby for nine months, gaining only 26 pounds, and totally expecting it to come right off when I leave the hospital. FYI it's been 10 years and I still have 10 pounds left to loose! Still not sure it suits me? Well, how about this: praying for nine months that I would be able to stay home with my sweet baby and still thinking it wouldn't require too many changes in my life. Let's all take a moment to laugh out loud. If you know my story, that prayer is what led me to Tallahassee. Yes, God did allow me stay home for 7 years, but only because it required a move away from all my lifelong friends and church. (By the way, this blog is not leading to an announcement that I'm pregnant!) In addition, I won't even discuss the countless special occasions that I built up in my mind as something akin to spectacular, marvelous, supernaturual even, and been disappointed because of my quixoticness ( not really sure that's a word but it works).

In my defense, I have to say that it's not entirely my fault for two reasons: one is God the other is movies. God did create me and put this specific personality trait within me; therefore, I know that it is not all bad and that He plans (and often does) use it for good. For example, I tend to see the brighter side of things, look for the good in a really, really bad situation, etc. One of my life's mottos is "Sometimes it's so bad, you gotta laugh." But I also have to deal with my ability to create grandiose plans and daydreams that never could come true. Oh, I have to admit sometimes my quixotic thoughts have come true and I've been thrilled, but my mind isn't batting 500 or even 100. Reason number two that my person suffers from quixotia (again, not really a word but it works) is those ridiculous chick flicks I watched growing up. (I can also blame it on the fairy tales our little princess minds embraced when I was younger). I still love to watch them, but I do prepare my heart and mind beforehand with a little mantra: this is not real life, this is not real life. I oftentimes find myself telling my OCAG girls that if some boy were to really say all that sappy stuff to them, they'd probably start giggling. Realistically, only a little mushy stuff keeps us interested -- get too mushy and we'll move on.

I know your probably thinking, "What does Don Quixote have to do with any of this?" If you know his story, you know that the word actually originated from him. He was an idealistic dreamer. Even more, his idealism and unrealistic thoughts made for some pretty funny literature. This fact reminds me to keep my motto, "Sometimes it's so bad, you just gotta laugh!"

Words and more words

I love words. It's simple, some words just convey everything. I have favorite words and some not so favorite words. Currently, my favorite word is epiphany. I revel in the epiphanies in my life. Mostly they come from God and occasionally when my blonde hair kicks in I have some epiphanies that aren't God inspired. You are probably asking what is an epiphany, right? Well, the teacher in me says "Go look it up!" but the friend in me says "Okay, I'll tell you." So I'll just tell you. An epiphany is a sudden insight or revelation. This is one of my favorite words for a reason. First and foremost, God sends epiphanies quite often to me. It's how He talks to me. I have friends who say that he speaks to them slowly and over time. Not me. He usually hits me with it pretty quick - as in I usually don't see it coming. This works for me though. He gets my attention, reminds me how much he loves me, redirects me to what's right, or simply refocuses me on the Truth!

Another reason I love the word epiphany is because I love to read and write. In order to be a good writer, you've got to bring me to that moment of sudden revelation. BUT, you must let me figure it out! Whatever you do don't tell me what the sudden revelation is -- I will get it. Just point me in the right direction. (If you love epiphanies read Peace Like A River or any book by Deeanne Gist.) My writing often focuses on epiphanies or at least contains a character that experiences one. In fact, I expect that many of my posts will be centered around personal epiphanies.

Finally, the word just sounds cool. I love the pop and slide of it. (Poetic moment emerging here. Must take a moment to relish in it.) This all brings us back around to my love of words - I'm a poet a heart. I love the chance to say something life-changing and radical and be forced to restrict it to only most profound and perfect words.

Well, I'll linger no more on that thought. I would love to hear about your favorite words. I might even add them to my list.